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Time Flies

April 2, 2012

I have been avoiding writing about this for months. Maybe if I didn’t write it down, it wouldn’t be true. Ah, we humans are such fools.

Goldie is failing.

Once again to the beach, dear friends
This is a couple years ago, after an epic beach run.

She has taken her last beach run. Her back legs have gotten so weak that she uses a ramp to get up into the car. One of her legs collapses without warning. Yesterday on the kitchen floor, all of her legs slid out to the sides and she lay sprawled and helpless until I lifted her up.

It is busting my heart up into little pieces. I look at her so often with tears in my eyes now.

I don’t know how much longer I’ll have her, but I think it will be measured in months, not years. Maybe a year. It stinks for me, because she is my girl, but it especially hurts me to think of my mom. Mom swore, when her dog Poncho died, that she would never get another. She said “It’s like losing a child” (which she has also done, twice, so don’t tell me she can’t compare).

Then I introduced Goldie into her life. Now they’re best friends and spend every day together. I don’t know how mom will survive this one.

Dogs deserve better. Why don’t they get 50 years instead of 12 to 20? I’d gladly give her some of mine.

Updated to add: Thanks for all your kind comments. Of course, as soon as I hit publish, she began dancing around like a puppy and wanting me to throw her toy for her (for the first time in about a year). Of course. Silly dogs.

43 Comments
  1. Rachel permalink
    April 2, 2012 17:43

    It’s so hard to watch our animal companions grow old. …and then. ugh. yeah. *hugs*

    • April 3, 2012 06:07

      I just hope I do the right things for her.

  2. April 2, 2012 17:53

    I’m so very sorry. It is so hard to lose our furry little family members.

    • April 3, 2012 06:06

      I try to prepare myself, but I know I can’t.

  3. April 2, 2012 18:18

    *sniff* I’m so sorry.

  4. rotarykat permalink
    April 2, 2012 18:36

    Such a great “doggy-mama”. Most people would envy the life you have given Goldie. Prayers for peace in the months ahead.

    • April 3, 2012 06:05

      She does have it pretty easy, considering I bought the car so it would work for her…and then there’s the sleeping on the bed. And the daily delivery service to Grandma’s house…

  5. Amanda permalink
    April 2, 2012 20:22

    The absolute worst part of pet ownership, to be sure. We just said goodbye to our sweet girl in March. Knowing we gave her the best life possible as been a huge comfort, but I still miss her like crazy. Sending hugs and kisses to Goldie tonight.

    • April 3, 2012 06:04

      Thank you. I gave her hugs and kisses!

  6. Jessie permalink
    April 2, 2012 20:25

    I’m so sorry… It’s heartbreaking, butremember the good times, and sneak in as many more as you can.

    • April 3, 2012 06:03

      She so often forgets that she was just limping around and goes ballistic about something…like a cat. Or yesterday, she really wanted to play with a toy, which hadn’t happened in a long time.

  7. April 2, 2012 21:47

    Oh no, I’m so sorry. They are our beautiful babies, and nothing hurts worse than seeing them hurting. Thinking of you and Goldie in the times ahead, and sending lots of hugs and love.

  8. adriennevh permalink
    April 2, 2012 22:03

    You and Goldie are a perfect pairing. Hug her for me, I miss that big ball of fur.

  9. cindymaddera permalink
    April 3, 2012 06:54

    Well, Shit. That’s all I’ve got. 2012 is the year of sad. I’m have T-shirts made. In the meantime I’m sending you strength and love to help you through the difficult times ahead.

    • April 11, 2012 21:18

      Tshirts for everyone. Thanks, darlin’

  10. kizzbeth permalink
    April 3, 2012 08:06

    Aw fuck. I hate this. I do know, though, that you’ll do right by her. You always do and you’re sensitive to going with the flow which is all we can do. Until then there will be extra treats and walks near the beach and all that time with your mom. I feel for your mom because she’s both going to lose Goldie and see you hurting. But I feel for you more because she’s your girl and I know what losing your girl is like and I wouldn’t wish it on anyone. Seriously. Not even Mitt Romney.

    Take lots more pictures. Give her a big kiss for me, please.

    xo

    • April 11, 2012 21:18

      Thanks, Kizz. I am so happy to hear that Eddie is becoming a star student at agility.

  11. Lisa C permalink
    April 3, 2012 08:27

    that sucks. sorry :-(

    • April 11, 2012 21:17

      Yes, yes it does. Thank you for your kind words.

  12. Elvie permalink
    April 3, 2012 08:57

    I’m so sorry. Wish I could be there to give you big hugs and a shoulder. Remember the good times, laugh at the funny times. She is a part of your heart and will be with you always. You have given her a good life full of love and joy.

    • April 11, 2012 21:17

      Thanks Elvie. I know you know all too well what I am going through.

  13. April 3, 2012 09:57

    Oh, Suebob, I’m so, so sorry to read this. It’s such a horribly difficult think to watch our beloved pets fail, and there is no way to make it easier. I wish there were something I could say, but there isn’t. My heart is with you, and Goldie, and your mom, though.

  14. April 3, 2012 12:29

    I’m so sorry.

  15. April 3, 2012 19:54

    Ah, I’m so sorry. I have gentled three wonderful companions into that dark night – although presenting myself as someone with this experience is a bittersweet badge.

    What I am the most certain of is the truth of this – “When it’s time, you’ll know.” They’ll let you know. That’s the only comfort you can get. That it is right, and that you are doing them a kindness.

    • April 11, 2012 21:16

      Thank you. I know you love your dear pets as much as humanly possible.

  16. April 4, 2012 19:34

    I’m so sorry about Goldie. I lost my cat last September, and every single day I miss seeing her perfect little face. For a while, I was where you are now; knowing the end was coming and wondering how I would know when it was time and when it did come, it just seemed so wickedly sudden. I don’t have any words of comfort because, I don’t know, there aren’t any really. But you still have time with Goldie and she knows you love her. Give her an extra snorgle from me.

    • April 11, 2012 21:12

      Aw. I’m sorry about your little cat. Yes, losing our loves always sucks.

      Snorgle is a great word. One of her million nicknames is “Snoozle.”

  17. April 4, 2012 20:45

    Give her a kiss on the top of her head for me. Ruffy is 10 and I always thought our girls would be good friends if we lived closer. Sending huge hugs to you. I get it.

    • April 11, 2012 21:11

      They would only be close if Ruffy let Goldie be the Boss Dog. She’s definitely the Alpha.

      Thanks for the kind words.

  18. April 4, 2012 22:30

    ah jeez, sue. i’m sorry. spoil her rotten while you can. *hugs*

  19. mar permalink
    April 5, 2012 08:29

    aw, I love Goldie and I’ve never met her; wish I could.
    There are no words, other than just me tearing up over it. I can’t imagine because I never had a pet growing up and even though Grover is only 3 and Millie is two, looking down the road chokes me up because they *are* my children.
    I’m so sorry, Suebob.

    • April 11, 2012 21:10

      Thank, Mar. I think writing posts like this is just my way of trying to prep myself.

  20. April 5, 2012 12:39

    I’m so sorry. From reading about your adventures with her, I can tell she an amazing dog. I hope her end is a peaceful one.

    Hugs.

    • April 11, 2012 21:03

      She IS a pretty dang good dog. Thank you.

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