My Reverse Life List A life list, a bucket list...the idea is that you make a big list of things you want to do before you die, and then you do them. Simple.

The only problem is that I am too lazy and not at all goal-oriented, so even when I make those kind of lists, I lose the paper, or I forget about it even if it is right there on the fridge, or I change my mind, or I put stuff on the list that I think sounds cool at the time, but who do I think I'm fooling with the surfing lessons? I can't WALK without spraining both ankles.

It also sounds so fussy and overprivileged. "Oh, I simply MUST see the Taj Mahal at dawn or I'll never be satisfied." The really satisfying dawns are the ones where the awe sneaks up on you, not where you plan it, in my opinion. But that's just me.

So, I am doing a reverse life list. I am doing cool things first, and then crossing them off. This saves confusion and disappointment. Rather, it is entirely satisfying. Ah, one more item off my list! Why look, everything is off my list!

So far I can cross off from my big Reverse Life List:

Go on a photowalk with a big group of strangers See a total eclipse of the sun Do yoga at 11,200 feet elevation Ride a ski lift (in the rain. With lightning) Sail on a tall ship Take a Zumba class Zipline in the rainforest See the jungle from a boat at dawn Visit Costa Rica Take the public bus across Costa Rica Look into the crater of an active volcano Walk across hanging bridges in the forest canopy See a wild toucan See wild monkeys Fly in a hot air balloon Ride a mule in Yosemite Wash my hair in a waterfall Jump off the pier and swim in to shore Fly in a helicopter over Kauai Walk a labyrinth Take an award-winning photo Build a Rose Parade Float Hike in Big Sur Pilot a helicopter (verrry briefly) Pick macadamia nuts Ride a recumbent tandem bike See a horse being born Drive a backhoe Learn another language Visit great art museums See the Constitution Have the White House pastry chef make me dessert Get a college degree Attend a TEDx event Touch a moon rock Volunteer on a presidential campaign Make a good wine Go white-water rafting Win a blue ribbon at the county fair Drive halfway across the country Be published on McSweeney's Do the chicken dance Drive sideways Plant 20 kinds of sage in my yard Climb a pyramid Host a big dessert party Buy a recumbent bike Roast my own coffee Go to Oaxaca Drive a Caterpillar See Buck Owens at the Crystal Palace Snorkel with sea turtles Get paid to write full-time Make beer Play roulette in Vegas Adopt a shelter dog Start a food blog Eat shave ice in Hawaii Design a book Get a big grin from Buddy Guy Heal a very old wound Go to the Grand Canyon Ride on the front trampoline of a catamaran in high seas Hug chef Michel Richard Go body surfing Visit Washington DC Ride an elephant Study A Course in Miracles Have Barack Obama answer one of my questions Save a lot of trees Have afternoon tea with all the trimmings Go to a pro soccer game Interview Anthony Bourdain Protest George W. Bush in his presence Get stopped by Secret Service (see above) Be the 9th caller See La Guelaguetza Taste 100 fruits and vegetables Paddle a canoe with my dad See the Grand Tetons Have a peak moment Go to chef school Start a life blog Manage a crew of amazing people Go to baseball Spring Training Marvel at the redwoods Hike in Zion National Park with my dad Watch fireworks from a yacht Meet cycling legend Davis Phinney Pet a live bear Petition the City Council Visit San Miguel Island Be in the middle of a huge electrical storm Help get a prisoner of conscience out of jail Go to the Rose Parade See a live condor Drive in a go-cart race Ring in the new millennium Play in the snow Celebrate the Harmonic Convergence See "Starry Night" Read at a poetry festival Dance on the lawn to Los Lobos Make cheese Course Marshal a pro cycling race Read at BlogHer Community Keynote Live by myself See a meteor shower Take a homeless person shopping Dance like a maniac to Koko Taylor Write front page, above-the-fold story Get baptised Hang out in a yurt See Half Dome Protest a war Interview a former first lady Make mole negro See a real autumn Eat a grasshopper Dance with Sufis Be a professional cook Dance to the Neville Brothers Go to NYC See the Grateful Dead Go to an NBA game Ride in a speed boat Go canyoning Visit a Frank Lloyd Wright building (my dentist office!) Be a bleacher bum Celebrate Samhain among 500 pagans Take a yoga class from Judith Lasater March for civil rights See panda bears and penguins Go to a nude beach Go on a Napa winery tour Attend Catholic mass Be published in "The Sun" Readers Write section See a full eclipse of the sun Ride a Harley Be on stage with Bill Cosby Stay at a fancy winery B&B Take the Chicago architectural boat tour Shop at LA's Grand Central Market Help land a multi-million dollar account Climb a mountain Thank a great teacher from elementary school See Bruce Springsteen Learn street fighting Experience an earthquake Watch the sooty shearwaters flock Teach Sunday School Speak on a BlogHer panel March in a Mardi Gras parade Be on the TV news Hear a symphony that makes me cry Celebrate Dia de los Muertos Receive laying on of hands See John Lee Hooker in a tiny venue Win a trophy Do improv comedy Make a bully back down Hug George Foreman Get hysterical See David Sedaris read Receive an answer to a prayer Give an award-winning speech Hear Brian Wilson play "Smile" Meet Rick Bayless and thank him Fall in love with opera Hike the Pinnacles Eat bananas I grew myself Learn to weld Visit the Carizzo Plains during wildflower season Bet on the ponies See Dave Chappelle Be in a movie test audience Collect eggs fresh from the chickens Inner tube through sugar cane field canals and tunnels Participate in important scientific research Win a chili cookoff Swim with the US. Men's Olympic Waterpolo team Raise a flower crop and sell it See the day when the Berlin Wall falls Play bocce ball Learn Salsa dancing Have Bob Harper tweet me Take a Nia class Introduce Mom to Vietnamese, Indian and Thai food See David Beckham play soccer Read at Ann Imig's open mic salon Let a bear eat a cookie out of my mouth Drive Highway 1 from Cambria to Monterey Attend BlogHer Entrepreneurs Have Susan Orlean answer a question Get retweeted by Scott Simon

The Raven Life List My dear friend CC invented a new Life List today: Stuff I Have Done and Never Want to Do Again. Let's call it the Raven Life List ("Quoth the Raven: Nevermore"). Not quite as glamorous as some people's Life Lists, and certainly not sponsored by anyone, but worth considering nevertheless.

Get a haircut at Supercuts Food poisoning from a suspect burrito Be dumped for an ex-girlfriend Be in a car when it was totaled Have the ex-girlfriend come to a meeting I was leading - at my house Dance with a guy who grabbed my boob Break a high heel Fart in a board meeting Drop something valuable into a public toilet Fly United Airlines Have my car die on a freeway onramp Pee my pants in public Rent a room to a psycho Be bullied in high school (hi, Jamie Lambert) Fail a class Be laid off Deal with Charter Cable customer service Eat leg of lamb Get caught making out in a car by the police Lose my shoes in the mud Have it rain for 28 days in a row Get attacked by a jealous ex-girlfriend Live with an unmedicated person with bipolar disorder Date someone who hated to brush their teeth Have a landlord with boundary issues Kill a rattlesnake Have a herniated disc Be too cold to sleep Go to a college on the quarter system Lose an heirloom Eat at Marie Callenders Get attacked by birds Have the sewage back up in the yard Go to small claims against idiots

Ok. Enough for now. You get the picture.

Museums I've Visited (this one came from Kizz of 117 Hudson and Cindy of Elephant Soap) Santa Barbara Museum of Art, Santa Barbara, CA Santa Barbara Museum of Natural History, Santa Barbara CA Los Angeles County Museum of Art, Los Angeles, CA Petersen Museum, Los Angeles, CA Bowers Museum, Orange County, California Museum of Modern Art, NYC San Luis Obispo Historical Museum, San Luis Obispo, CA Field Museum of Natural History, Chicago IL Smithsonian Air & Space Museum, Washington DC 10. National Archives, Washington DC National Portrait Gallery, Washington DC Hirshorn Museum and Sculpture Garden, Washington DC DeYoung Museum, San Francisco Santo Domingo Museum and Cultural Center, Oaxaca, Mexico San Diego Museum of Art, San Diego, CA Museo Rufino Tamayo, Oaxaca, Mexico Museo Monte Alban, Oaxaca, Mexico Museo de Arte y Diseño Contemporáneo, San Jose, Costa Rica Buffalo Bill Historical Center, Cody, Wyoming 20. Ventura County Museum, Ventura, CA Anacapa Island Museum, Channel Islands National Park Yosemite Museum, Yosemite National Park Carnegie Museum of Art, Oxnard, CA Museum of Contemporary Art, Los Angeles Norton Simon Museum, Pasadena, CA Huntington Library, San Marino, CA San Francisco Maritime National Park & USS Pampanito, San Francisco, CA Maritime Museum, San Francisco Exploratorium, San Francisco 30. San Luis Obispo Children's Museum, San Luis Obispo, CA Natural History Museum, Washington, DC Mingei International Museum, San Diego, CA San Diego Natural History Museum, San Diego, CA Travel Town Museum, Los Angeles, CA Ojai Valley Museum, Ojai, CA Morro Bay State Park Museum of Natural History, Morro Bay, CA Old Mission San Luis Obispo Museum, San Luis Obispo, CA Museum of Science and Industry (California Science Center), Los Angeles Getty Museum, Los Angeles, CA 40. Getty Villa, Malibu, CA Rosicrucians Egyptian Museum, San Jose, CA Wings of History Air Museum, Morgan Hill,CA Stagecoach Inn Museum, Newbury Park, CA National Steinbeck Center, Salinas, CA San Luis Obispo Mission Museum, San Luis Obispo, CA La Purisima Mission State Historic Park, Lompoc, CA Fowler Museum, UCLA, Los Angeles, CA Albinger Historical Museum, Ventura, CA Ventura County Agricultural Museum, Santa Paula, CA 50. Santa Paula Museum of Art, Santa Paula, CA Union Oil Museum, Santa Paula, CA San Luis Obispo Museum of Art, San Luis Obispo, CA Anacapa Island Museum, Channel Islands National Park, CA