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Travels with Goldie

September 19, 2011


Warning: sentence fragments ahead.

It pains me, what I am going to have to say in this post. Because you KNOW I hate to talk about All Things Fecal. But I can’t hold it in any longer. And apparently, neither can my dog.

My dog. My dear, dear old dog.


Ok, here I go.

Just like Goldie did in the car.

Three times in the past week.


Yes, she did. In the car, people.

Three times in the past week, Goldie has pooped in the car, her area of which is fortunately protected with sheets or blankets.

Some of which are now in a trash can on Main Street.

The first time it happened, it was just a tiny thing, and I thought she might have some digestive problem.

The second time I sensed a disturbing trend and bought pet diapers. Which I could not figure out how to put on. I have never diapered ANYTHING and the whole tail/legs/wiggly dog interface made it all the more difficult.

Time number three of Number Two was the Full Monty. A literal pile o’crap on the way to mom’s before church. Nothing says a blessed Sunday morning like getting gassed to death in your own vehicle.

It didn’t bother HER. I’m hanging out the window gagging, and she’s bouncing around like a ping-pong ball as I yell “DON’T STEP IN IT! DO NOT STEP IN IT!”

The only good part was I had something to meditate on during meditation. WHAT AM I GONNA DO ABOUT MY DOG? THE DOG WHO TRAVELS IN MY CAR WITH ME EVERY SINGLE DAY??

God gave me the answer: take her for a walk before you take her for a ride. So far, God was right on. Two walks, two poop-free rides. Now I just have to leave 15 minutes earlier than scheduled and stock up on plastic bags. I hope that takes care of it.

Because the next step is a U-Haul trailer behind the car.

Update: the walks are working so far. Three days, zero incidents. Whew.

  1. September 19, 2011 16:58

    Oh no, that would suck!! Glad you are having success with walking him first.


  2. September 20, 2011 06:04

    For some reason I just thought this would be physically impossible for a dog. I’ve watched Hooper. There is a science to how and where he poops. I don’t think he can work that experiment in the backseat of our car. I guess, then, I’m slightly impressed with Goldie. I can only imagine the balance and concentration it takes to perform such feats. There’s a bizarre circus act in here somewhere.

    Good luck with that.

    • September 20, 2011 12:09

      I don’t even know if she knows she’s doing it. I haven’t seen her in action, since I’m usually busy driving. That being said, she is a dog with many talents!

  3. September 20, 2011 07:17

    Old dogs, motivated dogs, dogs with a grudge even (though that’s not Goldie) can make it happen. Glad you found a work around, though, ’cause that’s not something you can live with. I’m impressed that you didn’t try to save the sheets and blankets and just get out of the car and chucked them!

    • September 20, 2011 12:09

      I had bought a whole pile of sheets at the thrift store after the second incident, so I was prepared!

      So far we have had three pre-ride walks and zero fecal incidents, so YAY for pooplessness.

  4. September 20, 2011 20:03

    Its a sad fact of age with some dogs, they just don’t have the control they used to have over their bowels. You are such a good mom, figuring out something that will work for Goldie so you don’t have car poops. Hmmmm….Car Poops. Sort of like Car Talk but with horrid stank instead of Click and Clack.

  5. September 20, 2011 20:03

    I’ve had three geriatric dogs so far, since getting my first dog in 1979.

    When our Dear Old Malamute started to slip downward, the “orbit” of his world shrank. he used to take long walks to poop. Then, when too tired to walk, he’d go to the far reaches of the yard to poop. Then as he grew weaker and weaker, his “poop place” was closer and closer to the place where he liked to hang out. The instinct remains – the distance shrinks.

    And when they get older, they can’t hold it as long as they once could.

    Pre-ride walks are good. Shorter rides are good, too. Is she still able to get into the car easy? How about mid-ride walks?

    I think it distresses the dog as much as it does humans for them to poop so close to their resting places, so the more you can help her avoid doing it, the better for both of you.

    • September 20, 2011 22:10

      Yes, thanks for the advice. I know she doesn’t like to be near it – the last time, she leapt into the front seat, something she rarely does.

      She gets into the car easily most days. Occasionally I get to lift her in – 65 lbs!

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